77! From Enormous Baby to Hyping the Homies

This week, Six Handshakes‽ (A new segment where we try to connect the dots between finds from far flung reaches of the internet.) Special guests Alex and Steven join Joey and Jess to talk about the six degrees of separation between this stay-at-home protestor investigation, the lovability of worms, enormous baby Then and Now, Bezos' wealth, muting on Zoom, and RuPaul's oil money. They don't talk about The Yolk Initiative.

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76! Future Foods and Dog Ownership with Matt Millington

What is the future of food? And what are the pros and cons of having a dog? [26:47]

This week, special guest Matt Millington joins Joey and Aaron to talk about stinging nettle soup, the UK's 'umami bomb,' milpas, Matt's dog Mr. Sid, Aaron's dog Rufio Cooper McFly, and Joey's dogs Ragamuffin, Gus, and Diablo. They don't talk about Jess's family dog Coco, nicknamed 'CocoNutButter.'

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75! Top 3 Things Not to Do in Quarantine, with Clarissa Pharr

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What are the Top 3 Things Not to Do in Quarantine?

This week, Live Clickbait! We and special guest Clarissa Pharr, deputy ideas editor at Quartz, discuss her picks:

  1. Don't text your ex.

  2. Don't call it "social distancing."

  3. Don't forget to tip the pizza delivery person.

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[Reruns] Meme Speak and Disney Princes

What impact will memes have on language? And why are Disney Princes so lame? [19:10]

This week, reruns from the Nonsense Wellspring (archive)!

Joey and Aaron talk about raiding Area 51, phatic expressions, inside jokes, lazy patriarchy, Mr. Mom-ism, and the inevitable queer Disney prince. They don't talk about sorghum flour.

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74! The Mobile Gaming Stigma and Quarantine Intimacy

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How can we destigmatize—and democratize— mobile gaming? And how might we maintain the intimacy we've developed during quarantine? [20:30]

This week, Aaron and Joey talk about Toon Blast, asking ourselves "am I the mayor?", how Dots is basically Candy Crush, small talk, Tom Figura's stand-up special, and doing "fine." They don't talk about whether Joey Tribbiani's "how you doin'" translates the same way.

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73! Being Bored and Alleviating Millennial Burnout

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How do we embrace boredom? And now that we have no excuses, when do we start doing all the things we've put off? [18:00]

This week, Joey and guest-with-absolutely-nothing-else-going-on Cristina talk about Joey's latest think piece, Jared Leto, Jess's meditative extracurricular, choosing what to wear, Cristina's to-do list, and the ways we distribute labor. They don't talk about the bad Isaac Newton stuff.

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72! WFH and The Best Pies

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How do you work from home? And what kind of pie is best? [21:36]

This week, Aaron, Joey, and Jess talk about being "WFH Curious," multi-tasking, taking stock of things, sweet potato soufflé, salmon pie, and Chicken Voilá. They don't talk about why Jess's family is so big on singing the Jell-o jingle.

71! The Data Crystal Ball and Escaping Our Algorithms

Why do we think we can predict the future with data? And how do we escape the confines of our algorithms? [16:11]

This week, Joey and Aaron talk about weather radars, Lorenz attractors, picking a good restaurant, Janelle Monaé, ambivalent Spotify, and Netflix's Max. They don't talk about vegan Hamster Hams.

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70! The Merits of Jargon and Exploitative TV

Where do we put our jargon? And what keeps us glued to exploitative television? [20:16]

This week, Joey and Aaron talk about technical language, Strategic Bento Boxes, removing tension with new words, Judge Judy, [blank]sploitation, and Antoine Dodson. They don't talk about Big Jim's promise to all patrons: one beer, 75 tickets, unlimited taters. /glory.

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69! Experiencing Time Differently and Protecting Queer Spaces

How do we perceive time differently? And how can we tell people they're not queer? [20:10]

This week, Joey and mystical-magical-sorcerer-wizarding Trevor also-magic-twice Larry talk about Kronos and Kairos, the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis, incense timepieces, living in the margins, 2nd movements, and painting your nails. They don't talk about how Leap day is coming up or how there are almost 400 time zones.

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68! Human Brands and The Vertical Video Debate

Why do we feel the need to humanize brands? And the great debate: vertical or horizontal?

This week, Joey and special bird Hannah talk about a Ritz-sponsored magazine, Lil Miquela, burger offsets, some Landscape mode science words, sizzle videos, and how it would be to watch The Revenant in a vertical orientation. They don't talk about how the Sistine Chapel ceiling was not actually commissioned by the Medici: only the altar wall fresco, The Last Judgement.

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67! Glass-Shattering Moments and Gifting

How should we deal with the plot twists in our own personal narratives? And a hot take: "gifting is a selfish act." [20:34]

This week, Joey and Aaron go rogue talking about Cincinnati chili, fairness, traumatic experiences, giving people puppies, the value of gift utility, and the role of love languages. They don't talk about how Jess did not endorse the contents of this episode.

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66! Our Parasocial Relationship with Kobe and Music Identity Politics

How do we mourn a parasocial relationship? And how do identity politics affect music genres? [17:34]

This week, Aaron, Joey, and Jess talk about Kobe, 1996, Titus Burgess, the new cowboy in town, appropriation, and "Daddy Lessons." They don't (enough) about Billy Porter's grammy look.

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65! Beyond Genre and Drops

What does the movie Parasite tell us about culture? And what are the consequences of all these drops? [18:20]

This week, Cultural Horoscopes! with our very own cultural astrologer Osei Kwakye. He, Joey, and Jess talk about subtitles, our categorization-machine tendencies, Good Boys, the Cosmic Crisp apple, social scarcity, and fat times. They don't talk about how that Frasier episode is Season 10, Episode 11: "Door Jam."

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64! Wild Prognostications 2020!

What's to come in 2020?

This week, Wild Prognostications! Special guest Ben Vander joins Jess, Aaron, and Joey to rank topics on a Goldilocks scale from "too wild" to "not wild enough." To be tracked through this year: culture war, modern asceticism, the tide turning on cars, bling, starter homes, hoaxes, and the appeal of pantries. They don't talk about the metrics behind "just wild enough:" it's more like a feeling.

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63! Nostalgia for Musicals and Dealing With Dying

How has nostalgia affected musical theater? And why is dying so hard? [23:19]

This week, mystical guest Dylan, Joey, and Jess talk about Shakespeare, Waitress, mandarins v. clementines [19:59], the symbiosis between old and young people, observando el Día de los Muertos, and #folkwisdom. They don't talk about Kimiko Glenn's knockout delivery of "When He Sees Me."

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62! '90s Action Films and Cleaning Digital House

What debt do we owe to '90s action movies? And how can we clean digital house in the new year? [21:41]

This week, Aaron and Joey talk about the most progressive movie genres, Atomic Blonde, Sigourney Weaver, ideas on Twitter, deep cleaning our feeds, and "the holey sock problem." They don't talk about how Joey is definitely 1000% wrong about Hitch.

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2019 Wild Prognostications: A Year in Review!

What happened in 2019?

This week, a special end of the year episode! Joey, Aaron, and Jess talk about "Made in anywhere-but-America," Jim Carrey's Trump art, the Lancet paper, unicorn mac and cheese, and purpose-washing. They don't talk about the title of their Zuckerberg Lion King remake.

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Year-End Wraps and Online Performativity

Why are we obsessed with year-end wrap-ups? And when does performance on social media go wrong? [17:26]

This week, special guests Steven Ebert and Nora Mestrich join Joey to talk about Spotify Wrapped, Dunbar's Number puns, rebirth, vague-booking, trauma, and Walden. They don't talk about how we never edit out things in post that we say we will.